The Teaching Mum

A light-hearted look at parenting through the eyes of a very busy English Teacher.

This House is not a Happy One.

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This house is not a happy one; in fact it’s really rather mad.

With food, toys and drinks all over the floor, it resembles the best party I’ve never had.

No, my partying ended years ago; I’ve swapped Pina Coladas for Pyjamas,

But, would I swap my life for anything?  A child-free trip to, perhaps, The Bahamas?


No, this house is not a happy one; there are times when there are tears

shed often by my little ones or by me when my fridge is devoid of any beers.

A river can flow through our little home and I stand and watch it rage;

With families come high emotions, but they’re no fun when they’re locked in a cage.


My house is not a happy one; there are days when we all feel stressed;

I’d stare down the barrel of a gun rather than battle with my daughter to get dressed.

“No!” she screams. “You first! Then my brother too.”

“Where’s the fun in wearing clothes when I can just play on my tablet sitting on the loo?”

The girl does have a point…

Won’t get dressed, but will wear a ‘lab’ coat.

This house is not a happy one; anguish often rears its ugly head,

More often than not, it tends to be a stumble, a tumble or shampoo in the eye before bed.

Bedtime should be peaceful and quiet; a time to think and reflect,

It’s not a time for bouncing, tag or hide and seek…our routine has a clear defect.


My home really isn’t happy; not when the washing pile is taller than me,

There was even a time when I machine washed Rainbowdash from My Little Pony!

I have a carpet in my living-room; once upon a time it grey and clean.

But, Santa brought Play-doh for Christmas and now it’s red, yellow, orange and green.


My home is not a happy one; pure happiness is a tough one to master.

Especially when my ‘artistic’ kids have drawn all over the floors, the walls and plaster.

My youngest was caught licking a wall and he left traces of his spit.

Should I show concern or does he know it’s the only way to get rid of purple felt tip?

The boy is a genius…

Erm, can you just remove that marker to the left of you?

How can a house be happy, when we get sick every once in a while?

Snot has been wiped in my hair that many times, it looks like I have a new hair style.

Calpol is my saviour when a temperature has me panicking and running around;

Administering anti-biotics is a wrestling match as I have to grapple my son to the ground.


My house is not merely a happy one; sometimes it’s filled with glee.

Contentment can grow from anywhere: smiling children, warm hugs or a hot cup of tea.

There are times when I feel I could burst; I’m so overwhelmed I can barely stand,

My kids tackle me to the floor; we fall laughing until I spot a rogue chunk of Crazee sand.


This house is not always happy, but it will always always be proud.

We will celebrate our achievements (small or big) and shout them out loud.

Whether it be ‘Top Speller’, riding without stabilisers or just a really awesome poo.

If you grow up good, strong and kind, my loves, we will always be proud of you.


Happiness takes many forms; my home will always have flaws,

But, it’s the acceptance of this that is the key to opening many doors.

To me, our unit is perfect and I know I have been dealt a great hand,

You are mine and I am yours and together we would make an awesome rock band.

The chaos Vs the calm


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